Placing Hedges Around Your Marriage

02/01/17 Compass Church

We all get married and think it will be simple to navigate life together because we are with the one we love.  While that may be true at first, the years begin to tick by slowly then more quickly, and we find ourselves changing.  When we let the busy swirl of this life take over, soon we have a relationship that is more like roommates than marriage.  When you got married, you may have been a free-spirited 20-year-old with big dreams, not a worn-out parent of four working a job that you hate.  My husband likes to call it “Groundhog Day.  We wake up, get the schedule done, flop into bed just to do it all the next day.   Where’s the free-spirited big dreams now?  They get shoved in the back of the closet for another time.   


It is in these moments, when we can’t seem to find our true self, that Satan creeps in.  He does it in little ways.  There’s a girl at the office who notices you are working out and says you look great.  There is a guy at work that really “gets” you.  He understands how hard it is to work full-time and run your household like a boss.  He thinks you are pretty great and tells you often.  These are harmless relationships and harmless conversations…until they’re not.  Satan just needs you to distract yourself with the “what-ifs.  These small harmless things are where he can derail your marriage.   


Each week we need to really see our spouse.  Think of the time and effort you invest in making your kids a success or job a success and channel that into making your marriage a success.  If we consistently give our leftovers to the ones we love, we will find everyone’s cup is empty.  With that in mind, we need to pray and place hedges around our marriage.  These are simple but impactful things that will make you stronger and more committed to each other.   


Praying a hedge is simple.  I pray over my kids every night and use the following phrase: “Place a hedge of protection around our beds, our rooms and our home.  In the name of Jesus, keep the evil one from us. Post your guards at our gates and keep us safe from harm.  This is a simple prayer for my children and home.  Think of a way you can pray a “hedge” around your marriage.  Maybe it’s something like this: In the name of Jesus, place a hedge of protection around our thoughts, our habits, our words and our steps.  Protect my husband and I from temptation, keep the evil one from our thought life and let us serve each other today.  Give us the energy and willingness to spend time with each other.  Protect us from sin.  In Jesus name, AMEN. 


Below is a list of 20 ways to place hedges around your marriage.  Take some time this week to see which ones speak to you.  Be intentional with your relationship and see how it will grow. 

These 20 items come from a blog post found here:     


  1. Stay clear of unnecessarily spending time with someone of the opposite sex.  

  1. Share carefully.  

  1. Stay in large public settings. 

  1. Don’t be naïve. 

  1. Increase your investment at home.  

  1. Step into your spouse’s world.  

  1. Add fun to your relationship.  

  1. Share temptation with your spouse.  

  1. No secrets.  

  1. Watch for seasons of increased vulnerability.  

  1. Pay attention to your thought life.  

  1. Don’t play the comparison game.  

  1. Communicate your needs to your spouse.  

  1. Push transparent, thoughtful, accountable communication to your spouse.  

  1. Stay away from pornography and erotic movies and novels.  

  1. Watch whom you spend time with.  

  1. Seek truth. 

  1. Love and respect around the clock.  

  1. Install an Internet filter.  

  1. Seek help.  


Every couple has different needs for protection. Place a hedge around your marriage today and see the strength that hedge provides.   


Kami Lee – Navigating Marriage

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